DEAR READERS. PLEASE NOTE I'M BEING A PATHETIC EMOTIONAL TEENGER WHO IS VENTING THROUGH THE USE OF HIS BLOG. IF YOU DON'T WANT TO READ ANYTHING THAT IS TO DO WITH MY LACK OF GIRLFRIEND, BECAUSE YOU ARE SICK OF THIS LOVE SICK BASTARD GOING ON ABOUT IT, THEN PLEASE DON'T READ THIS.
(I will not think badly of you for doing so.)
It is a strange feeling to be jealous. However, I suppose I'm jealous with good reason. I say that only because, all things considered, jealousy is a somewhat natural response in the situation I'm in.
I'm jealous of one of my best friends because the relationship he's in appears so easy. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for him, (This is his first relationship) but the ease and speed of it is what I'm really annoyed about.
2 days ago he was at my house talking to me about this girl he got asked out by. He said they went on a date and while he enjoyed it, he was unsure about whether or not he really wanted to get involved in something so serious so quickly.
I'm not jealous of him because he's got a nice, intelligent girlfriend, but just the ease in which he's found himself in this relationship is annoying. And she asked him. That's important. I mean that means she wants him enough to actually get the courage to ask him out. It also means that she is willing to go out of her way to organise time to be together and drive the relationship. Its basically proof that she likes him.
I'm jealous because I'm absolutely busting to find a girl who likes me for who I am and who I can show I love them. I've always had to ask out girls I've liked and as a consiquence I'm the one driving the relationship. For the most part I don't mind that, but there comes a time where I wan to feel loved for what I do. When I needed that with my first girlfriend, I was denied it and we broke up. Since then I've been craving it. Craving the intimacy, the care someone has for me, the touch, ability to look into someone's eyes and know that the love I feel for her is also resiprocated in her towards me.
I know this sounds so cliche and "Forever alone"-ish, but its how I feel. What about me?
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You should watch 'He's just not into you'.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure you'll find someone nice, maybe just not right now, but it'll happen. I'd introduce you to people just as nice as you, but Helen's taken and you're probably not interested in my Ian XD.
Oh Jonathan.
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